The ManicaPost
Dear Tete Barbara
For three months, my wife and I have been living separate lives under the same roof after she cheated on me with a man from her workplace.
Ever since that incident my wife has been trying hard to make things right. We have been receiving counselling separately and also as a couple and I have also realised that I have also contributed in a way to my wife’s actions.
Unfortunately when I found out about the issue I was so angry that I called my family and told them. A part of me has found peace with my wife, but my people want to deal with her this Christmas.
Now I think it is best for me not to allow them to visit this holiday as was planned. How do I tell them that I want to give her a second chance?
Tete Barbara Responds:
First, I would like to applaud you on the effort you have made as an individual and also as a couple to work on the problem that presented itself in your relationship.
It is unfortunate that your wife did what she did, but you can both find a resolution that will help you continue in your journey.
As for the relatives planning on coming down for the festive season, you can choose to either tell them the truth or find an excuse as to why they cannot visit.
I prefer the truth. Telling them the truth puts to rest the questions and plans they have been making as a way of helping you deal with your situation.
Your family is concerned over your well-being and the few months knowing that you were hurt have been a difficult time for them.
It is your duty to recall and calm their anxiety by shedding light on your current state and the steps you are taking to save your marriage.
It is your marriage and your decision is final but do not break the bond with your family. Thank them for their concern, but tell them that you still love your wife, how you have forgiven her and how you need their support.
Good Luck!
